I’m gonna be brief tonight, for a couple of reasons.
For one thing, there is a fly in my house and he’s a total asshole. I can’t kill him because he’s some kind of a ninja fly and he is immune to my Mister Miyagi chopsticks and he also has the ability to dematerialize just before coming in contact with a flyswatter, only to materialize again after it has passed. This fly mocks me and I now have a mission tonight that requires I defeat him. He’s also the loudest fly ever. He also landed on the edge of my drink and I think I took a sip after he had done so from the same spot so I probably have salmonella now. It is a poor excuse for slacking on the writing, but it’s not the only one which leads me to . . .
You people apparently have lives on the weekend. WordPress is kind enough to provide me with stats that let me know how many visits I get on any given day and where you are referred from and that kind of stuff. Now that 3 weeks or so have passed by I see one distinct trend. You folks get all illegitimate on the weekends, er, no wait . . . illiterate. You may be illegitimate too, I don’t know, I’m not here to judge. Either way, I know this gives me a little room to take it easy on the weekend because really, there just aren’t many of you around.
So this weekend, I’m making my store.
I’ve got a lot of ideas and I’ve got Photoshop all fired up and ready to go. Soon, tens of people across the land will proudly display their Opticynicism merchandise. It’s pretty empty right now, but the stock will grow over the weekend and continue growing as the blog does. Besides, one of these days I might get lucky. I could probably support a family on the goldmine Jenny hit with that damn chicken.
Someday I want to find my chicken.
As my introductory item, I’m going to offer up some love on my post on gay marriage with my bid for the Presidency in 2012.
So please check it out and give a brother a chance at the Presidency. Or at least help him make his car payment. You’ll love this mug. Just imagine the hours and hours of drinking pleasure it will bring you.
Are you imagining? Well DO it!
<——-Then click that sucker and go get one. Get two. Get enough for a 12 person setting and add a little spice to your next dinner party. Because nothing says elegance and class like a frosted beer mug with the word “bitch” on it.
So I’m a sappy sonofagun and I make you wanna puke with all my Sappy McSappiness. Well don’t puke on your carpet and cause a stain . . . buy one of my mugs and catch it before it gets on your carpet. My mug is dishwasher safe.
See what I did there?
Enjoy your weekend!!
Facebook post of the day:
This was a pic posted by my friend Greta. She took our good friend Deanna to Myrtle Beach, SC for the weekend to celebrate her finishing the bar exam this week. Congratulations Dee! We all know you kicked it’s ass!