Yeah I am! Totally not picking up right where I left off because, well . . . 3 years and stuff.
I spent the last couple of days doing some trimming and editing and cleaning things up in preparation for the re-introduction. One of the things I decided NOT to do was delete the last post,
Times, they are a changin’. I did that intentionally so you could check it out, read what I was planning to do and then come back to this post 3 years later so you could see that none o’ that shit happened.
[EDIT: Ok, so apparently in one of my insomnia fueled nights of reworking the blog, I did actually delete that post. Permanently, so I couldn’t even recover it. Suffice it to say that none of the shit I talked about in that post ended up happening.]
For the biggest change, I did not end up in Texas as I stated that I would. I did, however, escape the confines of West Jefferson, NC. I traded small, tourist town North Carolina for the much larger environs of Colorado Springs, CO. The mountains are bigger, the city is bigger and there is a hell of a lot more to do here. Not that I actually do anything but there is less oxygen up here so it makes even going to the grocery store a little more interesting. I also work 60 hours a week or more, so doing anything requires time that I don’t have at this point. Luckily enough, the 60 hour work weeks are seasonal and go back to 40 hours between June and January, so there is some time to experience the surroundings.
I live in a house in a “soccer mom” kinda neighborhood with two roommates. We are not the reason their property values have dropped, I don’t give a shit what the neighbors say. Fortunately for me, both my roommates are fuckin’ idiots so they should be providing me with some pretty good material. Just to keep you interested, let me give you a preview of some of the subjects I’ll be covering in the near future:
- Why the dishwasher does not automatically “know” when it’s full and start itself.
- Why my roommates drain the hot water heater moments before my dirty ass gets home from work.
- How frequently the phrase “I’m not paying for that” needs to be used.
- Why 1 guy with no job needs to do 3 loads of laundry a day.
- You. Are. So. Fucking. Stupid. It. Hurts. Me.
- What part of “that is MY refrigerator shelf” did you not comprehend?
- *which leads to* Why I have a mini-fridge in my room
There are so many more subjects that I’ll get to cover, but that is enough for the living situation teaser, because there is also the other place that I spend most of my time . . . work.
What am I doing with myself lately, you might ask? Well, kids, I’m a fork lift operator.
No, it’s not the intellectual challenge that I generally seek, but it keeps me outdoors and I’m actually pretty happy with it. I don’t have to take work home with me. When the day is over, it’s done and I can go home and just relax. More importantly, and those of you that know me will understand why this is important, I don’t do any customer service. That is for their safety as well as my own. Not that I don’t deal with anyone at all. There are still the truck drivers and that is a whole shit ton of posts in and of itself.
What company do I work for? Well, I can’t tell you that but it’s big and worldwide and every damn one of you has heard of it.
The biggest change for me of all? About a year ago I had to start wearing glasses to see anything within three feet of my face. I refuse to be old so I’m going to blame that on the tremendous over-use of alcohol in earlier years. Fuck off, there’ll be pictures later.
Most importantly, why did I decide to revive Opticynicism? That’s easy. A couple days ago, my friend “D” who was featured in some of my posts from 3 years ago decided to repost those bits of fun on Facebook to remind the world just how goddamn funny we were. We were, and still are. I also remember how much I loved writing those posts and the amazing people I met in the process of doing so. I was also recently encouraged to re-open my old gaming forum by some of my friends from there, so I figured I might as well go all out.
And here I am.
I’m sure there will be some changes to the layout and logo (but I’m keeping the bald dude because he still applies AND he is badass), but I’ll make sure you still keep getting the irreverant funny you always got. Those of you that know me will already be aware of this, but for you new folks, I don’t always put NSFW images in my posts, but if you are reading at work (you lazy bastards!), ALWAYS assume that they are!
Please, I encourage you to go back and read the old posts. I did and I’ve been laughing my ass off all weekend. Just to show off some of the earlier work and, of course, my friend “D”, I’ll make it easy on you and post the links to the 3 posts she revived on Facebook.
To those of you returning, I thank you! To those of you that are new, thank you for stopping in and I hope you will stick around. Let’s revive the FUNNEH!!
Facebook post of the day (yeah, I’m bringin’ that back too!)