Sep 07 2014

I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!

twitterhate

Not much happened this weekend, but a lot did too.  I’ve been doing some “behind the scenes” tweaks here and there for the blog like getting some junk cleared out to lighten the amount of space I’m taking up on my server and did pretty good since I cut about 2/3 of that used space down.  I had collected a lot of junk and multiple copies of the same image and images I just plain didn’t use anymore and cleaning all that out dropped that server space down considerably.

As in, I have 1000MB of space on my server and I was already using 909MB of it.  I now have it down to 256MB and my blog isn’t broken, so I’m calling it a solid win.  I also upgraded to the newest version of WordPress while having a panic attack over all the BACKUP ALL YOUR SHIT FIRST warnings and still came out unbroken, so it was a behind the scenes win all around.

The stuff I did that you CAN see, well I’ll just summarize for now because this is going to be the subject of a post all its own real soon:

  • Made a Pinterest account and added it to the sidebar (bear with me, I’m still learning it)
  • Added a section for some male bloggers that I like because the ladies were taking over (Thank you, Lisa!)
  • Added a section were you can easily get to all the different shit you can follow me on now
  • And I removed the “Inspirational Favorites” bar because everyone I’ve met inspires me and it wasn’t fair to point out a chosen few

Also, my laptop took a complete shit on me yesterday and I couldn’t make it do anything.  At all.  Ever.  So many hours of yesterday went into a complete factory restore and getting all my stuff loaded back onto it again and all is well again.  At least I hope it is because I’m typing this on it right now.

With everything all settled in to place and in good shape for now, I settled in with some Law & Order SVU marathon and some Twitter stalking as I’ve become prone to do lately.

That’s when this tweet popped up:

I don’t know how or why it popped up. I don’t follow him and he doesn’t follow me, but it had “porn” in it so naturally, I clicked it.

It was one of those “Click to open Gallery” sites that leads you through a series of pics and a short paragraph with each.  I was disappointed that it wasn’t actual porn, but I read through it nonetheless and it was all about how watching too much porn effects the chemistry of your brain and alters how you think and blah-de-blah-stopwatchingpornandgetahobbylikesurfingorsomething bullshit.

Well, I got as far as page 3 and this line happened:

“ALL porn is fantasy and it often perpetuates major stereotypes about women and men, and sexuality. It could also be transforming “sexuality” single-handedly . . . “

So being all “twelve year old” like I can do sometimes, I got as far as “single-handedly” and lost my shit.  I laughed and laughed.  It was awesome.  I can’t help it.  It’s my sense of humor and I thought I’d be funny and share my sense of humor with him, because I’m cool like that.

As it turns out, he was not as impressed with the humor that I saw in it and quickly shot back at me in this most eloquent way:

[EDIT:  The great and wise @bastardogeo has since deleted this conversation from his feed, so his Twitter posts as originally posted will not show up correctly in this post from this point forward.]

I was so fucking happy that I favorited that shit! I mean, I get the whole 140 character limit and shit, but I just got called ignorant by a guy that used “cuz”, “n” and “ur”(times fuckin’ 3) in his response . . . and relax, Chico, there’s humor in there somewhere. He had no sense of humor apparently and I admittedly got caught up in it and I shouldn’t have, but the rest went down like this:

. . . and I never heard from him again.

It is at this point in writing this post that I got all excited and clicked “Publish” instead of “Preview” . . . so if there are no words after this line, come back later because I’m an idiot.

So if you’re reading this line, you are getting the completed post (after I bitched about doing it to @qwertygirl on Twitter)

At any rate, I pissed off my first person on Twitter.  The first of many, I’m sure.  Not everyone gets my sense of humor and I don’t expect that everyone will.  Somewhere down the line I’m going to piss off more than one person and I’m sure they will let me know it.  I hear from friends all that time that will tell me, “Yeah, I love your blog, man, that shit is funny!”, but they don’t leave comments on the blog or on the Facebook posts.  Only a chosen few even share the FB posts.

But let me piss somebody off in one of those posts and I’ll be viral in an afternoon.  So the way I see it, my Twit-douche up there is just the first of many to eventually put me on the road to viral internet history.

I can take it.  It’s ok.  @RageMichelle did a great post about this very subject just yesterday and I encourage you to check it out.

I just hope the viral hate waits to come until the meds have fully kicked in or I might be knocking on @RageMichelle‘s door going “Just hold me!”

Either way . . . BRING IT!

———————————————————————————-

Facebook post of the Day is getting skipped so I can brag about my Foxy swag!

I’m gonna put it on my car (when I wash it someday) and I’m gonna keep the backing forever and ever because it has her autograph.

Permanent link to this article: https://www.opticynicism.com/2014/09/twitter-hater-now-im-somebody/

16 comments

Skip to comment form

  1. He seems like an odd character. I visited his website because I am nosy like that. It was kinda creepy somehow. Definitely doesn’t seem like he has much of a sense of humor at all!
    Angel The Alien recently posted…Lights Out!My Profile

    1. Yeah, he is definitely an odd one. Love his out of focus selfie for his profile pic too. I got a notification a little while ago. He favorited one of the tweets.

      One of his own.

      I suppose someone has to.

      Thanks for stopping in! I hope you got to read the completed post since I prematurely publicated.

      And don’t tell me it happens to everyone just to make me feel better.
      opticynicism recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

    • Teri on September 8, 2014 at 6:15 am
    • Reply

    How can you go through life and not find humor? He sounds miserable!

    1. Given that my sense of humor is the best therapy I have for myself, I can’t imagine how miserable I’d be if I didn’t have one. I don’t get it.

      Thanks for being here to tolerate it these last few years, Teri! I know with you around, I can always count on having at least 1 reader!
      opticynicism recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

  2. Thank you for the shout out!

    I’ve had a few people on twitter get really shitty with me over the past few years. I usually just block them. People can be vile.

    Also, I don’t get people who are overly serious on twitter. IT’S TWITTER FFS!

    For the record, I would have laughed too..dude was way too serious.
    Michelle recently posted…My Thick Skin Isn’tMy Profile

    1. You’re quite welcome, Michelle! You post was awesome and something I could really relate to. I know a lot of people that will be able to relate to it as well.

      And for real, if I’m going to go out and get all serious, I don’t think Twitter is the platform I want to be standing on to do it.

      Thanks for hangin’ out here! (and for the RT’s!)

      #fuckingfuck
      opticynicism recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

    • Smargie on September 8, 2014 at 2:19 pm
    • Reply

    Well, I think ur awesome n I luv 2 read ur blog cuz ur so funny. N ur certainly welcome in my existence. But, congrats on your first hater!

    Luv,

    Smargie (AKA @mccapers. You know–the one who has just gone ahead and purchased a box of Depends so as not to have to read your stuff while seated on the toilet ’cause my eyes aren’t getting any younger for God’s sake!) Yes, I know that commenting under a different name and using two email addresses isn’t helping me establish an internet presence, but it’s 2 late now. Oh, and why is it up to us to “Find your shit, quick!” and where did you last see it?

    #fuckingfuck Oh wait, I’m not writing this on twitter.

    1. Well thank you for the compliments . . . and never, ever type like that again.

      Perhaps I can change the wording of that, or maybe just remove the comma and it’ll make more sense.

      Or, you can just start from my very first post back in 2011 and just read them all until you are caught up! (You’ll have to excuse the 3 year gap, a LOT of shit happened in that time)

      Thanks for reading!

      . . . . whatever your name is today.
      opticynicism recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

  3. I can’t understand people who have no humor. I’ve known a few, and it seems like a bleak and dull existence to me. I especially can’t understand people who can’t laugh at themselves. Jesus, I’d run out of material pretty quick if I eliminated myself from my subject list.

    And I am convinced that people on Twitter who are writing tweets that are well under 140 characters who use fourteen year old abbreviations constantly (ur, b4, cuz) and leave out apostrophes and other punctuation do it because they don’t know how to spell or punctuate, not to “save space,” and I have the utmost disdain for them. Seriously had it been me, I’d probably have said something like “I may not have the answers to all of life’s questions, but I know how to spell ‘because,’ you subimbecilic amoeba.”

    1. Damn, that is EXACTLY what I was going to say to him but I didn’t think it would fit. Turns out, with his Twitter name included, it fits, with 14 spaces to spare! What the hell is wrong with us?! Our ramblings never fit in Twitter correctly.

      Because we’re all loquacious and shit.

      And Holy Christ, if I couldn’t laugh at myself, I’d have no blog at all.

      Thanks for following!!
      opticynicism recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

  4. Wow, someone needs to chill the hell out and stop taking himself so damn seriously! I just don’t understand people like that! How does anyone make it through the cesspool of life with out a sense of humor?? Hell, my cousin and I have set up verbal humor cues to help each other through funerals and such. I suppose some folks might think making each other laugh at a funeral is disrespectful, but the truth is, humor makes it possible to keep going. Besides, my entire family is the same way, so there is always laughter mixed with the tears at funerals. And that anal-retentive grouch really should consider giving the whole ‘single handed’ thing a try–maybe it’d help him loosen up a bit. Geesh!
    As always, thanks for making me laugh!
    Mickenzie recently posted…My Crotch Doctor Is Cooler Than Yours, My Nails Look Fabulous, And Miscellaneous Brain BarfMy Profile

      • Eric on September 9, 2014 at 11:47 am
      • Reply

      You always have to find a way to laugh, and when it’s inappropriate is when it turn out to be the funniest. You can tell the dumbest joke ever in the middle of a funeral and you won’t be crying because of the loss, it will be from trying so hard NOT to belly laugh in the middle of it all.

      You may as well lie in the middle of the church aisle and light a fart with a blowtorch.

      Gotta have humor everywhere.

      Thanks for reading!!
      Eric recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

  5. Wow, nice. That dude seemed to lose his cool pretty damn fast… :oS

    “ur a master of stupidity why argue with an expert” – Nice Twitter handle, but your ‘words’ are not looking so ‘arty’ right now. Ever heard of punctuation? You should look that shit up…
    The Raving Pleb recently posted…I Bet I Can Make You MiserableMy Profile

      • Eric on September 9, 2014 at 11:54 am
      • Reply

      I actually wasted the time to go visit his profile which led me to his “blog” that is all of maybe 3 days old and features his “poetry”, the first of which, from what I could gather from it, was all about waking up with morning wood and not being able to resist the urge to jerk off.

      Irony at its best.

      Given his Twitter profile, my final conclusion is: Pedophile with a creepy, windowless van.

      Thank you for reading my friend!!
      Eric recently posted…I have a Twitter hater now – I’m somebody!My Profile

  6. First of all, congratulations! You haven’t made it until people hate you without knowing you, so consider this your arrival party.

    I also found the “single-handedly” comment hilarious and the fact he didn’t see the humor in it just demonstrates that guy is into asphyixiation (or however you spell it).

    And you did the tweeting right. When you tweet a person and want to talk to them but don’t want everyone to see it (because it would give them more publicity they don’t deserve), just tweet with the @ symbol first. If you want others to see it put a period before the @ symbol.

    But in this guy’s case, why should he get extra publicity? He’s a douche. Love it!
    Lisa Newlin recently posted…Tinder Tuesday: 11th EditionMy Profile

    1. Thank you, Lisa! Yes, I take great pride in having my first hater. Because people are either going to love me or hate me, but either way . . . I’ve reached them in some way.

      I’ll call that progress.
      opticynicism recently posted…I Will Remember (Repost)My Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

CommentLuv badge

%d bloggers like this: