What does one say when they have vanished off the blogging globe for over 2 months, with long periods of the site being down during that time?
Nothing. One says nothing, that’s what he says.
I’ve been trying to get and keep my life on track and it has flipped my circadian rhythm into a design similar to a hurricane on a bad acid trip.
I sleep during the day. I sleep at night. I work during the day. I work at night. Tomorrow my schedule is . . .
. . . who fuckin’ knows.
That’s the advantage/disadvantage to being an Uber driver.
Yes, I’m still an Uber driver.
No, I have not been hired on at the hospital as of yet and really don’t know when or if it will ever happen. So I remain an Uber driver. I make my own schedule. I work only when I want to work.
Side note: I NEVER want to work. So I am frequently forced to tell my own ass to get to work in order to make money, to buy things like gas and tires and car washes, so I can go make more money to buy some more of that shit so I can make more money.
It’s a never-ending, depressing circle really.
In truth, I’m pretty happy with it. I’m sober and clean and have been for nearly 8 months now and I feel pretty damn good. I’m back at Liz’s house and have painted and designed my room into a nice little place that I really enjoy spending time in. It’s all black and gray and blue.
It’s a nice place to crawl into after a long night of dealing with
drunken, asshole, self-absorbed, entitled people Uber customers. It’s comforting and cool and my little corner of the planet.
Ok, so it’s not cool. My room is the place that the air conditioner does not go, but I won’t bitch about that because it will make all of my friends from the North start shouting at me to go fuck myself and my first world air conditioner problems.
Florida has chosen not to participate in Fall this year.
Winter’s not looking too good either.
All in all, I love my little cave and I am convincing myself to spend more time in it, writing. I’ve let myself slip away from writing and I need to not do that.
I’ve mentioned in the past how writing is therapy for me and it can be quite dangerous if I stop doing it. On the upside, my time “Ubering” has me spending a lot of time with drunken idiots and it has served well to remind me why I don’t want to go back to that habit.
There is a reason “”drunken idiot” rolls right off the tongue and “drunken sweetheart” causes this face . . .
Exactly. It just doesn’t happen.
Drunk people are dicks. Period. Especially so when they think you are “serving them”. As though my driving them home so they don’t get arrested somehow makes me their servant to do their bidding.
My cure for this attitude is that I am not opposed to dropping their ass off on the side of the freeway at 3:30 in the morning. I am doing them a favor. I am getting them home safely at a cost much cheaper than a taxi, and certainly cheaper than a DUI. They will sit back there and behave themselves because they are on camera and their extreme state of dickness is being saved for posterity. And legal reasons.
The sale of dash cams and pepper spray went up exponentially after this video went viral.
Beware drunken fools!!
Like any other customer service job, they aren’t all bad and some of them are even awesome. This is why the ability to rate the passenger is such a good thing. We know (somewhat) what kind of customer we are getting before we even go pick them up.
This is what I see when I am called to pick up a ride. See that little 4.8 * down there? That is the riders rating. An average of what other drivers have given him or her. Be a drunken asshole in my car, you will NOT have a 4.8 rating.
. . . and a word to the wise Uber rider, since there are many of you out there, an Uber driver must maintain a 4.6 rating MINIMUM or they will be deactivated. It is a common consensus that if we have to have a 4.6, so do you, so if you find at some point that drivers have a habit of cancelling on you, it’s a safe bet you pissed off a driver or two, and we understand the rating system.
That said, most of us put up with a lot of shit before we’ll rate anyone lower than a 5, because we get it, so if a driver rates you a 3, you’re probably just shy of that asshole in that video up there.
That is your Uber lesson for the day.
Don’t be a dick.
I’m sure there will be more lessons in the future. Don’t even get me started on the tipping issue, just DO IT. You can tip your Uber 100% and STILL be cheaper than a cab, so you have no excuse. We are not becoming independently wealthy doing this job.
I’ve rambled enough for today, but I just wanted to let everyone know that I was still around. I will try to be around more often and I have been paying attention to you all. I still read your blogs, I still follow you on Facebook and I still love the whole damn bunch of ya. I know that Aussa quit her job and I will forever miss the tales of the Nut House. I know Jeff has been schooling us on Panda Express and Chipotle. I even wonder if Jeff’s WordPress is a dick about the word “chipotle” also.
So I’m here, I really am, and I’m doing really well. It’s good to be back and I look forward to writing some more. I’ve got shit to vent about and funny stories to relate as well.
In the meantime, please think about what a funny story my Uber ride with three trans-sexual strip club performers would be and what a shame that there is totally not a video of the entire 30 minute ride in my car.
See ya’ll soon!